Just a dream

I always hold on to some kind of hope that this is all just a really long drawn out bad dream. Claire is doing amazing don't get me wrong but aside from that there is the constant worring about her medical bills, gas for the car to take her to and from the hospitals, the tolls for when we have to make the trip to Philadelphia. it all adds up.

Recently, as in yesterday, my van that I had broke down on me. It was formerly my dad's van and when he purchased a new car the old van became mine. It is a 2003 Kia Sedona. It has over 170,000 miles and I think it has finally broken down to the point when I do not have the funds to fix it nor the will to do so.

So now I am down to borrowing my parents vehicles which I hate to do. I strive to be self efficient in the ways I am able to at this point, which isn't much. I was able to have and maintain  my own car for a while and now I can't.

I was on unemployment since I had Claire but now that has run out and I have a phone interview for SSI on the 11th. So here's hoping.

I just want to say for the record that I am not one to complain, but at this point it seems to be one thing after another and it is adding a lot of extra stress and emotions that I need to get out. So I figured I might as well give this a go, not that any one will actually read this. lol.

In other news, my best friend is marring my cousin come next year. She already purchased her gown and three of the bridesmaids, including I have as well. It is so exciting for her and helping her with the plans is really keeping my mind off of all the stress of Claire, so there's that.